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Manspreading, the Crime!‏

Dear Poppet,

Wonderful news! The UK Telegraph reports that Manspreading, after far too long, finally as being treated as the criminal act that it is:

“According to a recent report from the Police Reform Organising Project, at least two men have been arrested and charged on grounds of the M–word, “presumably because they were […]

Bad News! You Can Get Drunk at Home‏

Dear Heart,

Sit down. I have some bad news.

We’ve a rare reversal.

You can get drunk at home. Newser reports:

“Iowa’s Supreme Court endorsed the right to be drunk on the front porch of a private home, ruling that a woman can’t be convicted of public intoxication while standing on her front steps. […]

Bring On The Spanish Inquisition For The Crime of Saying Silly Things‏

My very Darling,

One of my most cherished privileges is to really lower the boom, hard, on anyone uttering politically incorrect sentiments.

Sir Richard Timothy Hunt — who shared the 2001 Nobel Prize in Physiology or Medicine — made the public observation, as reported by Newser, that “when women work alongside men in labs, […]

Shut Down That Lemonade Stand, Missies!‏

Dear Heart,

Can you imagine the nerve of some people? These 7 and 8 year old girls dast to open up a lemonade stand without first getting a permit! KLTV reports:

“Andria and Zoey Green wanted to raise $105 for a Father’s Day present. “We were trying to raise some money to take our […]

Arrest Those Overenthusiastic parents!‏

Dear Poppet,

Imagine how happy it made me to see arrest warrants issued for parents who actually cheered out loud at their child’s High School graduation. It must have made you happy too. Must!

CBS Houston reports:

“Four people who cheered at a Mississippi high school graduation may be thrown in jail after police […]

That Puddle in “Your” Back Yard? It’s Mine!!!‏

 

Dear Heart,

Perhaps (if you do not live in California) it rains from time to time in your neighborhood. Perhaps, sometimes, a puddle appears in “your yard.” That puddle is Mine! As reported, recently, in The Washington Times:

“President Obama’s administration on Wednesday claimed dominion over all of America’s streams, creeks, rills, ditches, […]

Ban Pinball (Again)!‏

 

Dear Heart,

Oh for the Good Old Days….

Atlas Obscura reminds us that Once Upon A Time pinball was a forbidden!

“But in the 1940s and for decades after, the pinging, zinging, flicking, bumping game of pinball was considered by many to be both a moral and economic stain on America’s proud cultural […]

The Queen of England Has It Almost Right!‏

O Best Beloved,

The status of the Queen of England provides important precedents! Her Majesty is Above The Law. As I should, in all ways, be. (The Law should be reserved for you, Silly!) According to Business Insider:

“Queen Elizabeth II is not like you and me. “Did you know she is immune from […]

I’ll Tax Your Failures Too!‏

Dear Heart,

It warms the cockles of my heart to see how the city of Milwaukee goes the extra mile: Regulating and taxing going-out-of-business sales. According to the Wisconsin Law Journal:

“Milwaukee not only makes it difficult to go into business, it makes it difficult to go out of business. The city requires a […]

Bad Setback! Freedom of Speech Upheld, Right in the Capital‏

Dear Heart, Are you sitting down? We’ve had a bad setback! Freedom of speech has been upheld, and right where you’d least expect it — in the nation’s capital. >Shudder< According to the Nefarious Institute of “Justice,” to wit:

In a resounding victory for free speech, today the U.S. Court of Appeals for the […]

The Truth About Public Health‏

My darling Poppet!

Our Crusade to snuff out the remnants of Liberty is making such splendid Progress that more and more of my Minions are coming out of the Closet.

Imagine my thrill in encountering, in Scientific American, the darling Patrick Mustain’s Confessions of a Nanny-State Food Cop: The Truth about Public Health:

“I’m […]

No Kissing Allowed, Children!‏

Dear Heart,

No kissing on the lips! Especially if you are 7 years old!

The Smoking Gun reports, and I applaud the witness who called police to report it, two grade school children kissing on the lips in class:

“Responding to ‘allegations’ that the children kissed ‘on the lips’ during class last Tuesday, a […]

Three cheers for college speech codes!‏

Oh Best Beloved,

Share my joy that Chicago Law School professor Eric Posner, writes, in a leading Progressive online magazine, Slate.com, that “Universities are Right — and Within Their Rights — to Crack Down on Speech and Behavior!” Prof. Posner:

“Universities have strengthened rules prohibiting offensive speech typically targeted at racial, ethnic, and sexual […]

Google Rules America (Under Me)!‏

Dear Heart,

Imagine my unadulterated Joy in recently rereading the words of Google chairman Eric Schmidt as reprised by Steve Tobak in FoxBusiness’s ValleyBeat:

“In an interview with the Atlantic almost five years ago, the search empire’s dark lord himself, Eric Schmidt, said, “Google policy is to get right up to the creepy line […]

A $200 Ticket For Putting Lip Balm On At Red Lights In Vegas!‏

My Poppet,

Points and a $200 Fine? Hard time would be more appropriate!

CBS Las Vegas reports that an alert Las Vegas police officer ticketed a reckless daredevil of a woman who dared to apply lip balm while stopped at a red light:

“A Las Vegas woman claims she got a $200 ticket after […]

Yes, you! You are guilty!‏

Dear Heart,

Author Harvey Silvergate reveals the depth of your guilt, as summarized at the Amazon description of his book Three Felonies A Day: How the Feds Target the Innocent:

“The average professional in this country wakes up in the morning, goes to work, comes home, eats dinner, and then goes to sleep, unaware […]

Hooray for Me When Pravda.ru chides America for Bolshevism!‏

Dear Heart,

The Russian word for Truth is Pravda. Pravda, the “newspaper” of the Soviet Union’s Communist Party, would spell out the truth comprehensively for all Soviet citizens every day. (The Good Old Days!)

Now the Pravda.ru website, in Moscow, makes a dramatic acknowledgement of the progress we are making in America! Hooray for […]

Guilty Until Proven Innocent!‏

Darling,

It warms the cockles of my heart — and should warn your cockles too — to see that the Montgomery County, Maryland, Authorities have propounded a finding of “unsubstantiated” child neglect, and even better, one based on no law. (There is no law in Maryland against not supervising your children outdoors.)

This is […]

Hooray for Hippie Punching!!!‏

Oh Best Beloved,

Josiah Neele blogged, a year and a half ago, about something exquisite and under-appreciated: The Science of Hippie Punching. Mr. Neele:

“For those not in the know, “hippie-punching” refers to when someone (usually but not always on the center-left) attacks someone farther to their left as a means of gaining credibility […]

Wonderful Al Gore says: “punish climate change deniers!”‏

Oh Best Beloved!

As reported in TechTimes (and many other places), former Vice President — and, we can only hope, future President, Al Gore recently spoke at SXSW and … raised the bar:

“Former U.S. Vice President Al Gore proposes to “punish climate change deniers.” Gore also suggests that politicians who reject “accepted science” […]

No Flying Double Stringed Kites!!!‏

My Darling Poppet,

Ungrateful wretch Parramatta, writing in the UK Daily Telegraph, says:

Nanny State is so last week — we are living in a Granny State that is so focused on keeping its citizens from any sort of harm, that we might as well be sitting tight in our homes where nothing bad […]

The Modern Drunkard And The Perils Of Free Speech‏

My darling,

In my devotion to you I have warned, and will continue to warn, of the perils of “Freedom” of the Press and of the pernicious First Amendment purporting to guarantee such a ghastly concept.

Imagine my consternation upon encountering the consequences of such an invitation to libertinage, the online Modern Drunkard Magazine, […]

Caitlyn, get with it you retro thing!‏

Dear Soon-To-Be Gender Fluid One!

Vivian Giang, writing in that bastion of the bourgeoisie, Fortune Magazine, tells us just how far we have come… and where we, gleefully, are hurtling, It is a truly magnificent piece of propaganda: Transgender is yesterday’s news!

“At elite liberal arts colleges like Vassar and Wesleyan, students have earnest […]

Auntie Sam Likes the Word Prohibit‏

My darling,

Nolan Finley of The Detroit News brings attention to a Hero of the State, Michigan state senator Rick Jones. (Mr. Finley adopts a suspiciously critical tone. One infers such a tone represents an arch, ironic, criticism of Sen. Jones’s own critics.) Finley writes:

“Rick Jones is on a Big Government rampage in […]

Operation Search And Destroy: School Lunches!‏

Dear Poppet,

England is setting a splendid precedent by demonstrating admirable solicitude for its (often fat!) children. The UK Express admirably exalts a newish policy in England encouraging teachers to search their students’ lunch boxes to confiscate food the teacher deems dangerous:

“As part of an assault on childhood obesity, the Government allows school […]